My friend Marc and I have both been using cell phones for a long time. And Marc's a pretty smart guy - very tech-savvy, too. But he, like 99% of the other people I speak to, wants a standard way to handle the daily occurrence of a dropped cell phone call.

OK, so nobody has declared me the Emily Post of the wireless world, but somebody's got to give this a shot so I'll put on the flak jacket and step outside in the hopes that Marc - and everyone else - ultimately settles on a standard way to deal with the inevitable.

A little background: If you can remember as far back as the days of analog cellular phones (the first generation, or "1G" in the process leading up to the "3G" that we have now) then you probably remember the four words repeated more often than any others by users: "Are you still there??" Since the transition from the first generation - 1G - to the second generation - 2G - phones, the frequency of that question has diminished greatly.

The fundamental difference, you see, between 1G and 2G service, is that the first was analog and the second digital - and digital phones drop a lot fewer calls. (The 3G designation is still digital; the "3" in "3G" is a designator of wireless data speeds for Internet access, email downloading, etc., and doesn't really impact the ability of a phone to hold a call or not.) But dropped calls are still a problem and, depending on the area, carrier and type of phone you use, can be a major headache.

Cellular companies go to great pains to avoid these dropped calls because they generate ill will, frustration and complaints from customers (or "subscribers," as they're referred to in the wireless industry - I'll never understand why). They cost the companies huge sums of money to handle through the customer service department, requests for credits and the loss of customers to other carriers who, customers hope, will provide better coverage. The fact is that the coverage areas for most carriers today - and especially for the two major ones, AT&T and Verizon - are roughly comparable. In fact, when people ask me which service provider I recommend I usually give them my stock answer, "They all stink, just in different places." And, compared to other parts of the world where I've used my phones extensively, they do stink. I've made and received calls on the subway in Hong Kong, in elevators in Tokyo and in remote areas of Australia; for the most part you can't do that in the U.S. That said, they're getting a lot better.

Nonetheless, dropped calls happen everyday and we need to set a standard for how to deal with them from a practical and etiquette standpoint. First of all, it helps to understand why calls get dropped and how carriers are working towards fixing that. I wrote about that extensively in a piece about a year ago called, fairly enough, I thought, "Are Cell Phone Carriers Really That Bad?". It's a given, though, that it's going to happen, so let me tell you how I deal with dropped calls and you can tell me if you think that my approach makes any sense to you. If not, let's work together to come up with a standard procedure and, when it's complete, I'll publicize the results and we'll see if we can start a trend.

Here are my thoughts:

1. Dropped calls are going to happen. Let's all agree that we can't avoid them and certainly shouldn't blame anyone else when it happens. Just because your friend, partner, spouse or child's phone drops a call it doesn't mean that they wanted it to happen. It's not their fault and just because your call gets dropped doesn't mean that the carrier that they use is worse than yours.
   In short: Keep cool when someone else's phone drops the call - it's a fact of life.
   
2. It's not always the other guy's phone. Make sure that you check your phone regularly to be certain that it's not yours. If it's got an antenna that screws into the handset make sure it's not bent and is screwed in tightly. Make sure your battery is fully charged, too, as you won't get the best coverage with a weak battery. If the phone is really old (more than two years, by the wireless industry's instant gratification standard) consider buying a new one. The improvement in technology from two years ago - not to mention all the cool features you'll get on the new one - will make it worthwhile.
   In short: Don't assume that it's always someone else's phone.
   
3. When a call drops one of the two parties will have to call back. I've taken the informal approach of "he who makes the call, repeats the call." To me, it makes sense because one party's phone number may have been blocked or isn't easy for someone else to recall on their phone - whoever made the call first will have the other party's number. Also, if one of you is on a cell phone and the other is on a landline the cell phone user is going to know when they're in a better coverage area to call back. And if you're the landline user and originated the call? Well, when you call back to the cell phone don't get frustrated if you get voicemail - the phone may still be out of coverage - but please, don't leave a voicemail message. Just wait a few minutes and call back. Only after you try a couple of times should you leave a message.
   In short: The original caller should be the one to call back, but don't leave a message unless you've tried calling back several times without getting through.
   
   
4. What's the right thing to say when you get back on the line with the other person? Do you apologize for something that's not your fault? Do you ignore it and just continue where you left off? Here's what I do: If the other person was talking when the call got dropped I say, "The last thing I heard was…" If I was talking when the call got dropped I say, "Hi. What was the last thing you heard me say?" What I don't say is, "Sorry" or "Gee, I don't know what happened." I do know what happened - the call got dropped - I just don't know why it happened.
   In short: Don't apologize - just try to get back to where you were quickly and continue the conversation.
   
   
5. Finally, there are limits to everyone's patience. If one of the two parties on the call is clearly in an area that's causing a lot of dropped calls, you can avoid a lot of frustration by agreeing to postpone the call until later. Which, if you can't communicate on the phone, you can do via a quick text message saying "call u later." Even if you have coverage poor enough to cause lots of dropped calls text messages will, for the most part, get through just fine.
   In short: It's a radio first and a telephone second - it won't always be possible to stay connected.

OK, I've got my Emily Post hat stored back in the closet containing all of the Wireless Wizard's other costumes, gadgets and gizmos until some other etiquette breach occurs or all dropped call problems are resolved. Until then, Marc, let's see if we can meet for lunch instead.